Reclaiming the Feminine – My Dance with Gender and Rejection

Is Reclaiming the Divine Feminine really what the project is?

Or is there another crucial, crucial piece that has to be included?


There is a powerful movement afoot in the world to Reclaim the Divine Feminine. Many people are teaching this. I agree that it is an important part of our movement into a new world where everyone matters. And in my experience there’s far more to the story than is being told yet.


I became aware, about ten years ago, how much what we reject forms our experience of the world. Often in ways we really, really don’t want. A life built on what you reject may be stimulating for awhile – and over time, is a dismal, exhausted affair.

When I began to understand that I have an unconscious world that is here for me to explore, and a place where I can make profound changes in my level of peace, happiness and joy, I began a time of intense exploration. I found some great teachers, who showed me how to learn about and manage what I consider to be the most important component of that inner world – my values.


Today I can say, with complete conviction, that my happiness is a direct result of my clarity around and relationship with my values.

  • My clarity about what they actually are,
  • Whether or not I believe that they are in conflict, so I can’t have both at once, I have to choose –
  • And whether I am moving toward something I “want” because I truly love it, or whether I am moving toward it because I reject its opposite.


Gender has been an issue for me all my life. My presence in this world in the body of a girl at a time when being a girl was, in my estimation, a really stupid choice for someone who wanted to make some kind of difference in the world. Very little of this was conscious – and much of what I was conscious of I was actually mistaken about.


I’ve been trying to figure out how to share my experience of what it has been like, inside my own head and body, to be a girl in the latter half of the 20th century.


I made a new friend this weekend, an Australian who is in Cambodia at the moment. He is raising a beautiful powerful young daughter, and wants to do everything he can to build a strong foundation for her.


We spoke on Skype and covered a lot of ground…but I didn’t want to spend our time together with me relating this piece. I told him I would tape it and send it to him so he could listen to my experience of gender, especially as it relates to a current piece of conventional wisdom – that what we need to do is to bring back, re-integrate the divine feminine, and why it matters so much.

In my experience, that is a dangerous oversimplification of what needs to happen. It is one part of what needs to happen, but if that is all we do, we are missing the boat, and very well maybe adding to the polarity and conflict. So – here’s the recording I made for Michael, of my experience, and my take on what else needs to happen, as we reclaim our beautiful, powerful feminine energies.

Thanks for listening!